A short tale. In more ways than one.
Aug. 4th, 2009 10:14 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
blue_soaringHere I am. Jonesing for porn. Again.
The evil twin is writing porn, but instead of giving me tidbits, she keeps saying things like, "Mike is mean," and "Aha! >:D" which, while scintillating, aren't quite cutting it.
I demand tidbits.
She says, "I HAD AN EVIL IDEA."
I think about mixing myself a drink.
Instead of hanging out with my pal, Jack the Emotional Crutch, I brilliantly say, "Two can play this game, baby!" and never mind she's not the one with the addict jitters.
Breaking open a word doc, I intend to get right down to business. Dirty, dirty business. And then-
Great. The neighbours are having sex. Either that, or the wolf they call a dog is humping the wall, because the wall, it is shaking. Shaking, rattling, and if a wall could roll, it would be.
I'm sorta reluctantly impressed.
About three seconds later, it stops, and I say to the evil twin, "Whew. Alright, well. That's over."
Maybe because I called out to Roomie to tell her I think the neighbours are fucking and now they're too embarrassed to keep their groove on. They probably think I am one rude, uncouth individual.
Either way, I guess the sex wasn't that great.
The evil twin is writing porn, but instead of giving me tidbits, she keeps saying things like, "Mike is mean," and "Aha! >:D" which, while scintillating, aren't quite cutting it.
I demand tidbits.
She says, "I HAD AN EVIL IDEA."
I think about mixing myself a drink.
Instead of hanging out with my pal, Jack the Emotional Crutch, I brilliantly say, "Two can play this game, baby!" and never mind she's not the one with the addict jitters.
Breaking open a word doc, I intend to get right down to business. Dirty, dirty business. And then-
Great. The neighbours are having sex. Either that, or the wolf they call a dog is humping the wall, because the wall, it is shaking. Shaking, rattling, and if a wall could roll, it would be.
I'm sorta reluctantly impressed.
About three seconds later, it stops, and I say to the evil twin, "Whew. Alright, well. That's over."
Maybe because I called out to Roomie to tell her I think the neighbours are fucking and now they're too embarrassed to keep their groove on. They probably think I am one rude, uncouth individual.
Either way, I guess the sex wasn't that great.
no subject
Date: 2009-08-05 05:41 am (UTC)Except for the part implying that I am in some way cruel or driving you towards the bottle. Pish.
no subject
Date: 2009-08-05 05:45 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-08-06 01:54 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-08-06 05:11 am (UTC)