My god, this was scorchingly, achingly good. I can't get over your descriptions, and the intense glimpses you give into a Dean that's so beautifully broken. Seriously phenomenal. I have so many favorite lines it's ridiculous, and I COULD err on the side of not crazy, but I think instead I'll give into the urge and copy here the ones that knocked me flat on my ass. This was truly amazing.
So yes, the favorite lines: It was like a drug: the more they fought, the more Sam wanted him. Sam's secret, sick rebellion rubbed in their father's face, every kiss a hissed look at what you've made me, every time he came with Dean's name on his lips a snarled hate me, hate me because I do this to my brother. & Those days, they couldn't be in the same room together or the angry spark between them would ignite the air, burn up every last scrap of oxygen and leave Dean gasping in Sam's furious aftermath. & "Learned it from you," Sam said, and spit. Behind closed eyes, Dean saw the bright splash of red on the dirty brown snow. "Not much difference, when you think about it. You say jump, he says, 'how high?'. I say fuck me, he says, 'how hard?'" & A black, smug voice in the back of his head that wasn't really Sam said, You can't rape the willing, and Dean thought, But I'll let you use me. & The ache lingered for hours, the bruises for weeks, the loss of Sam like a phantom limb for four years, three months, ten days. & Sam makes a harsh, guttural noise, fist clenched like he's going to punch the wheel. "Just tell me no. Christ, Dean, just tell me no."
(note: not having the insanejournal myself, so ummm, just so this doesn't sit here as a confusingly anonymous comment, I'm dreamlittleyo over on LJ -- and reiterate again that I. loved. this. fic.)
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branchandroot
no subject
Date: 2007-10-06 05:23 am (UTC)So yes, the favorite lines:
It was like a drug: the more they fought, the more Sam wanted him. Sam's secret, sick rebellion rubbed in their father's face, every kiss a hissed look at what you've made me, every time he came with Dean's name on his lips a snarled hate me, hate me because I do this to my brother.
&
Those days, they couldn't be in the same room together or the angry spark between them would ignite the air, burn up every last scrap of oxygen and leave Dean gasping in Sam's furious aftermath.
&
"Learned it from you," Sam said, and spit. Behind closed eyes, Dean saw the bright splash of red on the dirty brown snow. "Not much difference, when you think about it. You say jump, he says, 'how high?'. I say fuck me, he says, 'how hard?'"
&
A black, smug voice in the back of his head that wasn't really Sam said, You can't rape the willing, and Dean thought, But I'll let you use me.
&
The ache lingered for hours, the bruises for weeks, the loss of Sam like a phantom limb for four years, three months, ten days.
&
Sam makes a harsh, guttural noise, fist clenched like he's going to punch the wheel. "Just tell me no. Christ, Dean, just tell me no."
(note: not having the insanejournal myself, so ummm, just so this doesn't sit here as a confusingly anonymous comment, I'm dreamlittleyo over on LJ -- and reiterate again that I. loved. this. fic.)